Friday, September 7, 2018

The Shape of Water by Guillermo Del Toro and Daniel Kraus

1 Star

I hate that that’s my reaction to this book, but good god almighty was it a slog for me. And it sucks double because I obviously read it wrong being that the handful of my friends who have already read it really enjoyed it. I don’t know what happened. I mean, the story is one that’s been told a time or twelve before. . . . .

“Man should be better than monsters.” “Ah, but who are the monsters?”

But that’s not something that ever deters me from a book (seriously, I’m totally the sucker gal who’s always going to be first in line for “the next Gone Girl”). It also can’t be because it was “weird” because one of my favorite films of all time will forever be . . . .

The only thing that can be blamed? The writing. Overwritten literary fiction good v. evil with a side of monstersmex is apparently not my cuppa. Not to mention all the various sideplots about becoming a modern woman in the 60s or a closeted homosexual ready for love too late in life and the Russkies and good lord almighty once again . . . . .

Before you troll me please note I am NOT a reader who willingly seeks out things I will dislike in order to post some ragey review (in fact, those people are all on my bottomless blocked list). I want to loooooooove every book I read . . . or at least I want to not feel like I wasted my (and potentially a buddy’s) time. Since I’m not a big moviegoer as soon as I saw The Shape Of Water also had a print version I immediately went to the library. And I waited. FOR MONTHS. Not even kidding, Stepheny has been waiting for this journey to begin since her baby was born, it seems. For the past three days all I’ve done is think about all of the other books I have waiting to be read that are sure to bring me more joy than this. And that’s not a good thing.

Stepheny opted for the audio version. I hope to all that is right in the universe the Wizarding World that she ends up having a better experience than I did.

And speaking of Stepheny. I was smitten with our resident Harry Potter re-reader extraordinaire pretty much from the jumpstart, but the moment where she told a 12-year to go eff off sealed the deal and had me saying . . . .

I am 100% aware that I absolutely S.U.C.K. as a buddy-reader for a multitude of reasons, which makes me ever-the-more thankful she still wanted to play in the same sandbox as me.

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