Tuesday, July 26, 2016

Stroked by Meghan Quinn

4 Stars

Oh, there’s a Meghan Quinn book available to review????


Being the red-blooded ‘Murican I am, I was totally down for a real patriotic type of read – especially one about a swimmer turned reality television star and his quest for gold in the Rio Olympics . . .

Yeah yeah yeah I know. Divers aren’t swimmers but seriously tomato tomahto when it comes to gifs. After all, they both wear Speedos and Tom Daley is totes farking adorbs.

Okay, on with the book. This is the story of Paisley (WTF with these stupid ass names in romance novels, right????? I feel ya). An unfortunate hot mic incident that went viral left Paisley unemployed and blacklisted with every production crew in Hollywood. Well, all but one.

Introducing Bellini . . .

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She’s famous for doing . . . well nothing really except spending her father’s money. Her father is famous for??? A “near-death experience of being brutally humped by Orson, the demon pig” (no relation to Mitchell).

Paisley’s shot at getting her foot back in the door is as Bellini’s PA on her new reality show, which she co-stars in with her boyfriend, legendary Olympian but never gold medalist Reese . . .

“What is a girl supposed to say to the Sexiest Man Alive? Thank you, please come over and impregnate me so I can be attached to you forever, stroke you whenever I want, and lick your nipples just because I feel like it? Might be a little aggressive.”

Now if you’re worrying about a love triangle angle, have no fear. Reese and Bellini’s relationship is 100% sham. Reese and Paisley, on the other hand . . . .

“You’re fucking sexy when you moan like that. We should try it out in bed some time.”

“Reese!” I hiss, leaning forward and scanning the place to see if anyone can hear our conversation. “I’m your assistant.”

He shrugs. “Technicality.”

Thank Tom Cruise they eliminate that technicality . . .

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Okay, so this was marketed as a “Rom Com” and it was . . . kinda. It just wasn’t as funny as The Mother Road. Buuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut, the sex???

“A couple of things I learned last night: Reese likes to talk dirty, which is a major turn on. He is also very demanding in the bedroom.”

So good. Soooooo sooooooooooooooooooo good.

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It also helped that Reese was a “bad boy” swimmer which in porno world means . . .

“He’s dark, mysterious, sports a beard right up until competition where he shaves it before getting in the pool.”

And since I had just watched 13 Hours (looky me reading all smart books and shit) he was immediately pictured as . . . .

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Yep, I just admitted I watched a movie about some horrible event and got a lady boner off of John Krasinsky’s ripped abs, beard and chest hair. God bless America!

Anyway, as with most errrrrrything I’ve read by Meghan Quinn I recommend this one . . .

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She just doesn’t know it yet.

ARC provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Thank you, NetGalley!

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