Saturday, June 27, 2015

Guardians of the Galaxy: Prelude by Abnett/Lanning/Alves/Clark/Ramos

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2 Stars
 
A certain group of bullies “friends” here are constantly riding my butt in an attempt to get me to read superhero-y stuff. I keep fighting the good fight, but I have to admit I have embraced a certain group of galactic warriors as my type of peeps . . .

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When a movie makes eleventy trillion dollars and People’s current “Sexiest Man Alive” takes a backseat to Andy Dwyer a potential replacement People’s Sexiest Man, the powers that be wanna make that cheddar anyway possible. Unfortunately like most “movie tie-ins” this one left me with some serious disappoint.

Prelude offered a mixed bag of tales in order to provide a little backstory on most of the characters from the film – all of which were pretty much turds. The volume begins with Nebula’s story . . .

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And also features the many makeovers of Gamora . . .

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The Deadliest Woman in the Whole Galaxy!!!

There’s a little taste of the awesome which will become this duo . . .

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But then a trip on the Wayback Machine brings 1950’s artwork and stories that just DID. NOT. Work for me. Iron Man and Drax? Pass. (Am I the only person in the world who doesn’t like Iron Man? Wait. Don’t answer that.) An Adam Warlock story featuring . . .

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F*&^ to the nah, thank you very much.

A story featuring Jeff’s BFF . . .

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is also thrown in for good measure. It seems the Hulk has somehow ended up in the wrong quadrant with Rocket Raccoon and his faithful sidekick . . . . Wal Russ???? WTF? Here’s what I think of that combo . . .

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Anywho, Hulk only wants to return to Earth, but in order to do so he must battle an evil mole . . .

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Sadly, yet another tale I could have easily lived without. Now, it wasn’t quite as bad as Groot as a bad guy or the fact that Star-Lord’s story was the SAME F’ING ONE PROVIDED IN Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 1: Cosmic Avengers, but it still sucked.

Bottom line, if you’re a superfan that just HAS to have everything in your collection you probably need to buy this – otherwise you can definitely skip it. If you’re a Chris Pratt superfan, here’s a little something just for you . . .

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Oh wait, one last thing . . .

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BWAHAHAHA! I loved Andy Dwyer Chris Pratt before ALL Y’ALL!
 

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