Deadpool: The Ones With Deadpool by Paul Scheer (Text), Nick Giovannetti (Text), Gerry Duggan (Goodreads Author) (Text), Christopher Hastings (Goodreads Author) (Text), Salva Espin (Illustrations), Scott Kolins (Illustrations), Evan Shaner (Illustrations), Jacopo Camagni (Illustrations)

5 Stars

 

And then the lion fell in love with the lamb . . . .



. . . or something like that.

For a couple of years now I’ve successfully dodged what I like to call the “Superhero Comic Book Bully Club” while maintaining the stance that if there were ever a superhero for me, it would probably be the Merc with the Mouth. Fart jokes, cursing – let’s face it, we are pretty much kindred spirits.

I finally decided to cave in to the peer pressure, but added the stipulation that I would ONLY read Deadpool in order to satisfy my superhero quota. Since I’m an idiot I didn’t bother reading the synopsis for Deadpool – The Ones with Deadpool when Anne and Jeff suggested this title for our buddy read. (I was too busy pooping my drawers about the fact that my library actually had a comic I was attempting to request.) Imagine my surprise when the selection the bullies picked happened to include EVERY. SINGLE. SUPERHERO. EVER. Okay, well maybe not ever (I mean no one in their right mind wants to read about Aquaman, right?), but seriously the first page . . . .



Well played, buttheads. Well played.

Good thing for them I liked it so I won’t have to send Mitchell on a quest to dismember them. I mean, I really liked it . . . .



The “grab bag of Deadpool” style was most definitely a winner for me.

We begin with “Deadpool Annual #1.” Deadpoool is simply trying to exterminate Daredevil (who doesn’t want to kill some rando lawyer on the daily, right?) when Madcap boops in, things go a bit to the Fear and Loathing side . . .



and I learn about some potential sexytime positions for when I consummate my relationship with Wade Wilson . . .



Next up is “Deadpool Annual #2.” This one is mainly about how Wade wants to be besties with someone other than me . . .



This storyline also featured He Who Shall Not Be Named’s cousin or something-or-other . . .



I stopped paying attention once I found out I was getting cheated on.

The third selection is “Animal Style” (groooowwwwwwwl). Wait, what? Oh yeah. Mitchell just reminded me it was all very Blackfish and that I’m disgusting. Whatevs. Anyway, this one started off with a bit of foreshadowing of what was to come later . . .



*snort* How can anyone not love this guy????

It also featured what I’m sure was Jeff’s favorite moment of the entire collection . . .



Once I got over being super sad about the atrocities of Sea World, I found it to be HILARIOUS. Obviously I’m a glass half full kind of gal . . . .



Which leads us to the grand finale “Death of Wolvervine: Deadpool & Captain America #1.” Per the title, Wolverine is dead and it’s up to Deadpool and Old Man Nebbercracker (or maybe it was Cap’n ‘Murica) to keep it that way . . .



So you win jerks Buddy Readers (view spoiler)[(hide spoiler)]. If it weren’t for you, I would never have found this back-up plan for if my fantasy of spending happily-ever-after with my first choice fails to pan out . . .


(mucho thanks to Aimee for this family portrait)

My only concern now is that Ryan Reynolds will fart everything up in the movie version (and I hope all of you sickos who think he’s super hot will be forced to watch melty face unmasked Deadpoool!). Also, are there only like three actors in Hollyweird? Once you f*&^ up one superhero movie role, you shouldn’t get to play another one . . .



DON’T EVEN THINK I’M NOT ALSO LOOKING YOU, BATFLECK!!!!!!

Anyway, that’s it. Read this. It’s hilarious and despite what you may have heard from the naysayers, it’s pretty smart too . . .

Deadly Class - 1987 Regan Youth by Rick Remender (Writer), Wesley Craig (Illustrator) and Lee Loughridge (Illustrator)

5 Stars

 

“Life is a series of unique opportunities. It’s our job to find the happiness in each one.”

I may not be a graphic novel expert, but I know what I like and BOY OH BOY DID I LIKE THIS!!!!!

Like all of my graphic novels reviews, I can’t give away all of the . . .



for fear the army of tiny Goodreads Spoiler Trolls will barrage my review space with nasty commentary. I will say this had everything Mitchell and I look for in a good story. Deadly Class had a magical learning establishment . . .



where awesome courses like Assassin Psychology, Beheading, Poison, and Hand-to-Hand Combat were taught . . .



Nasty cliques . . .



No. Like REALLY nasty cliques . . .



A great soundtrack . . .



Drug usage . . .



And a plot to murder Ronald Reagan. The Gipper? Say it ain’t so!!!!





Oh, I can’t forget to mention the art. Now I realize I know about shit from shinola about artwork, but this was the best I’ve ever seen. Every. Single. Panel. was spectacular . . .



ALL THE STARS!!!!!

 

Highly recommended (to everyone except Erica that is – ‘cause she’ll just read it wrong and make me have a sad).

 

Modern Romance by Aziz Ansari

3.5 Stars

 

Modern Romance went on my TBR as soon as I heard rumors of its existence. We’re talking about waiting months for this damn thing (and also never being able to track down an ARC) . . .



Quick confession – I never bothered reading the synopsis for this book. I saw Aziz Ansari had a “romance” book coming out and my brain immediately thought it would be something like “Tom Haverford’s Guide to Dating” . . .



If I would have bothered reading the blurb, I would have realized that:

“Ansari combines his irreverent humor with cutting-edge social science to give us an unforgettable tour of our new romantic world.”

This book was seriously science-y. And not in a bad way either. It was an exploration of how finding a match has morphed from the 1950s to the present – but with an Ansari twist that brought the LOLz:

“Aron published another study, title “Couples’ Shared Participation in Novel and Arousing Activities and Experienced Relationship Quality” (damn, dude, shorten the names or your studies!)”

Modern Romance begins with Ansari admitting that he’s totally a girl. (HA! Just kidding. Bet that got some of you who have accused Mitchell and I of being women haters here on Goodreads all worked up.) Seriously though, Ansari’s introduction includes him picturing his future with a woman he made out with one night, questioning whether a text message came off too desperate or needy, wondering whether the lack of response to said text message is because of him or because some horrible accident befell his potential soulmate, etc. Basically, he proves in three pages that chicks and dudes are TOTALLY THE SAME when it comes to modern day relationships.

Then there was a brief trip on the waybackmachine a lá When Harry Met Sally which included interviews of nursing home residents regarding how/when/where they met their spouse (there was also a lot of talk about how delicious donuts are in this segment. Mmmmmmm, donuts). I confirmed that I could easily be transplanted to the 1950s since I got married when I was a fetus instead of waiting until I was pushing 30 like modern-day women tend to do. *shrug*

The book then fast-forwards through the ages to today and the land of terrifying technology . . .



It covered everything from the mind games of not immediately responding to text messages in order to not appear desperate, to how modern romance works in countries other than ‘Murica, to online dating (I’m telling you, if it gets any easier than Tinder y’all single folks might as well just buy sex robots and save yourself the time and effort of leaving the house), to cyberstalking snooping on your significant other . . .



and reminded readers that you might not always get a boner every time you touch your beloved’s hair, but that doesn’t mean you’re “settling.”

If you’re looking for a laugh a second book of Ansari’s hits and misses when it comes to the romance game, this probably isn’t the choice for you. However, if you’re interested in a sociological study of how dating has evolved over time with some humor added in to the mix, this one’s a winner. And really – who can pass up getting to know a little more about Aziz Ansari’s outlook on love . . .



Note: I am still holding out hope that Aziz will write a straight-up hilarious autobiography . . .


^^^crosses fingers^^^^

 

 

All It Takes by Sadie Munroe

2 Stars

I requested this book for one reason and one reason only . . . .



I have a morbid fascination with all things hoarding related. I know. I’m heartless and also not right in the head. I can’t help it : (

The premise of this book is that Star was removed from her mother’s custody as a wee little child due to the conditions of their house. Now Star’s momma has gone to that big ol’ pile of dead kittehs in the sky and Star needs to get the house cleaned out and sold. Once she returns to her hometown, she finds it filled with some serious buttholes who somehow have it in their head they are better than everyone else, but are really probably just white trash . . .



Star runs across Ash in the local diner where the townies are giving him grief for being a “murderer” who has just been released from the pokey. Since she quickly realized she’s in over her head with the hoard, Star decides to offer Ash a job helping her out for the summer. It also probably doesn’t hurt that he is an ex-con who looks like this . . .



So, there you have it. Now, where do I begin???? Let’s start with some positives. There was zero instalove in this book. Praise Jeebus! Star and Ash work together, develop a friendship, etc. before they ever . . . .



There were also no drunky time whoopsies. If there’s one thing I hate more than almost anything in romance novels is the “maybe that was a mistake phony will they or won’t they pointless 50 page filler.” Once these two got down they got down. And they did it just the way I like it. “Hey Kelly – would you like some flavor with your ice cream today?” No thanks, vanilla is perfect for me . . .



Now with the notsagreatstuff. This was typical NA fare with plenty of angst and an extra helping of . . .



Move over Chester, ‘cause this one might be the cheesiest (there’s even an “OH FFS!” status update below this review if you don’t believe me). In addition to being cheesetastic, there was also a lot of throwing back of the head and laughing. I’m sure I’ve done this a time or twelve myself, but to have it keep getting repeated over and over and over again made me picture . . .



Not sexy. On the plus side, at first I thought Star was going keep “worrying her lower lip” and then I was going to have to seriously cut a bitch. No more lip biting references allowed. Ever. Sorry authors, you can all direct your hate mail to E.L. James.

My main gripe, however, was the driving force behind the plot itself. Why a 19-year old with nearly zero dollars would spend her entire summer cleaning out a trashed house just to put it up for sale is beyond me. Watch any episode of Hoarders. The experts will tell you that even without a collection of dead cats, these houses are always battling roaches and/or mice, they have structural issues due to the weight of the hoard, etc. In real life this girl should have called 1-800-GOT-JUNK or the We Buy Ugly Houses people and just made as much cash as soon as she possibly could. Is it really so much to ask for a story to be a little realistic????

And finally. The ending. Or should I say non-ending. How the f*&^ does a book just END like this? This could have been 3 Stars, but when it was like “okay, I’ve written enough so I’ll just stop here” with no real conclusion? Nuh uh . . . .



ARC provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. 

Thank you, NetGalley!

We Are Monsters by Brian Kirk

2 Stars

 

“Half the patients were put in here because they claim to talk to God. But preachers do the same thing and they’re put in positions of power and praise.”

When I saw We Are Monsters available for grabs I was super stoked. I mean, a book about the apocalypse (real one, not zombie version) coming to an insane asylum????? YES PLEASE!!!!! But then I read it and I was all . . .



First, I’m pretty sure before it’s all said and done someone out there is going to inform me how I read this one wrong - and second, Mitchell is going to seriously hurt me if I keep forcing him to read stuff we both end up not liking. *shrug* It is what it is.

This book started out strong. Mental hospital, a doctor with a real God complex, a serial killer who believed he was saving the world from the End of Days. Such excite Mitchell and I both had! But then we reached the halfway point . . .



and it just didn’t work for me any longer. All of the build-up that had me on the edge of my seat abruptly stopped, the tone of the story changed, hell the entire plot morphed into something else. I’m sure this story will work for many, but for me? The two halves seemed totally disjointed, the message got a little too preachy . . . .

“We’re sick. We’re all sick. But we can be cured. And we can be kind. And we don’t have to let our lives be ruled by the shadows of the past. Not if we act through love.”

and basically . . .



ARC provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review. 

Thank you, NetGalley!