An Unwanted Guest by Shari Lapena

4 Stars

Despite The Couple Next Door only being an average read for me, I immediately clicked the request (which is still pending so go ahead and decline that one, NetGalley) button for Lapena’s new novel. Thanks to friends’ mediocre ratings I lowered my expectations accordingly. But I didn’t realize that An Unwanted Guest was pretty much going to be . . . . .



I am a SUCKER for retellings of And Then There Were None. Up to and including an annual viewing of the ever-so-underrated . . . .



And this one took place in the Catskills which instantly had me thinking of . . . .



Sing along, everyone . . . .



*In case you haven’t figured it out yet, you should probably adjust your own expectations accordingly, because this most likely wasn’t nearly as good as I thought it was.

But I did think it was good and read half of it without even realizing it the other evening. Call me a sucker for a group of strangers holed up in a hotel during a snowstorm when a superbadawful takes place . . . . .



You know what happens next, right????



AND MORE DEAD BODIES. Yipeeeeeeeee!!!!

The only thing that would have been better is if it weren’t 95 degrees outside on the day I read it – but there was zero chance I was going to be able to wait until winter as I am most assuredly an instant gratification type of gal.

Good Luck With That by Kristan Higgins

3 Stars

“We live in a skinny world.”

“Really? Because I live in America, and we are NOT a skinny nation, hon.”

I know this was an ARC and I’m not supposed to quote it, but put two tears in a bucket and motherfuckit because that up there is G.O.L.D.

I have to admit that the ONLY reason I wanted to read this was due to the controversy. Please note I didn’t bother looking at the actual “oh this is so offensive and fat shamey” rant until AFTER I finished reading.

Now that I’m done what do I have to stay about the book? Well, let’s address the good and then we’ll get to the notsogood:

First, perfect title is perfect because whether it’s actually said out loud or simply thought in a “shaming” thought bubble – “Good Luck With That” is often the reaction people who continually say they’re going to change something about themselves – but never end up actually being able to (or being happy about) – receive. Be it losing 100 pounds or quitting smoking or chopping their long hair into a pixie cut because “it’ll be super cute now that it’s a different color” (<<<< can you figure out which one is me????) Anyway, right or wrong it sometimes happens.

Second, these friendships. We’re talking #lifegoals here people. These women were UNCONDITIONALLY supportive of each other. There was no “Oh Lord girl, you are TOO FAT now and don’t tell me it’s not because you eat two large pizzas every night” or “you’re going to get a divorce? You KNOW no one else is going to love your fucked up self” or “Really? A chef? You seriously think people are going to want to get a ‘healthy’ dinner delivered from a fat girl?” THAT is shaming and there was none of it.

Third, the list . . . .



(Please note this list is something that was written by a child, but seriously I never realized how monumental tucking in a fucking shirt could be until I got fat.)

Fourth, Kristan Higgins pretty much just GETS. IT. I’m not going to get banned from freebies forever by posting highlighted segments, but she gets it.

Okay, so what didn’t I like?

Well to begin with: If you’re not a fan of Chick Lit stay far farrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr away because this thing is so chicky it might as well have come with a free lifetime supply of tampons.

It also felt like it was about 47,000 pages long. It could definitely stand to take a turn on the chopping block.

Next, all three of these women needed massive amounts of therapy stat. The one who dies (not a spoiler, the whole story only happens because she dies like instantly) is the only one who actually acknowledged not only her unhealthy relationship with food but the reason behind it. The two survivors? Both had mommy/daddy/sibling issues and needed professional help since they were mid-30s and still crippled emotionally by their families.

Which leads to the WHY??????? If anyone wants to clutch their pearls and get offended, THIS is what should offend them. Why couldn’t at least one of them JUST. BE. FAT. Again, Emerson (the one who dies) eventually tells her reason and it’s one that makes sense. But seriously I’m like 99.99999% sure Marley would have never been “skinny” due to genetics because she was presented as someone who worked out and ate healthy and etc., etc., etc. so WHY ADD ON THAT TWIN BULLSHIT?!?!?!?! And if I really want to go ahead and re-write this author’s (perfectly fine) story for her, I kinda wish Georgia would have been presented as someone who was always not truly “fat” (more like a “plus size” 12-14 because her mom actually WAS a fat-shaming asshole) who ended up with body dysmorphia and an eating disorder because of it. However, that’s not how it was and they were all fucked up due to their families and apparently fat people can’t just be fat without superbadawfuls so like I said get pissed if you want because that was sort of grating.

Then, every single man in the thing was either an uggo (excluding potentially the brother’s husband, but he wasn’t in it enough for me to confirm that thought) or so jacked up that THEY needed therapy too.

Finally, wanting to change other people. Broken people SHOULD NOT be throwing stones from inside their glass houses FFS. Georgia with the nephew and Marley with Will. Annoying and unfortunately the moment never came when either woman was told to STFU and fix herself first before trying to fix someone else.

And again, super chick litty. But the message wasn’t meant to be a negative one so here’s to never being disappointed with what you see in the mirror : )

Now to address what started this whole mess . . . . .



Sit the fuck down. To other readers: PLEEEEEEAAAAAAASE be careful what bandwagon you jump on. People who get offended by something THEY HAVEN’T EVEN READ (and no, reading/skimming 1/3 of a book is NOT reading the book) are probably not well-informed when it comes to what was supposedly so offensive. And like 99.99999% of the time someone is “triggered” by some bullshit I instantly channel my inner Inigo Montoya because they keep using words that don’t mean what they think they do. Also, authors who get ranty about other authors aren’t necessarily looking out for anything but their own best interest. Half the time (and that’s being kind) they could give a shit about feminism or fat people or spreading some good word about love and light. Instead they bash a book only to follow said bashing in short order with an announcement that THEY have written something about the same topic and EVERYONE (*cough their mom, grandma and aunts cough*) says it’s sure to be a hit. The majority of the rest of the time THEY ARE STILL SIMPLY CAUSING AN UPROAR IN AN ATTEMPT TO GARNER ATTENTION FOR THEMSELVES/SELL THEIR OWN (*cough probably self-pubbed cough*) BOOKS. Bottom line, be leery of the person crying BBA if there’s a chance that THEY may actually be one.

ARC provided by NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.

Thank you, NetGalley!

Sugar Daddy by Lisa Kleypas

4 Stars

Lisa Kleypas definitely doesn’t need my crappy little review in order to sell books, so I’ll make this short and sweet and then tell y’all how I ended up arriving terribly late to this party.

Liberty wound up in Welcome, Texas as a kid with her momma and momma’s deadbeat boyfriend. It was in Welcome that she met Hardy – boy next door (and on the wrong side of the tracks) who placed Liberty firmly in the friendzone due to their age difference. Fast-forward a few years and you find a Hardy who still maintains his distance in order to make sure nothing will stop him from blowing the dust off this one horse town, deadbeat boyfriend kicked to the curb, momma dead and Liberty trying her best to raise her baby sister. While working as an apprentice at a high-end salon, Liberty meets Churchill Travis – known around town as a “Sugar Daddy.” You’ll have to read the rest for yourself . . . . .



Oh yes. I did.

I seriously ATE. THIS. THING. UP. Really my only gripe????



Terms of endearment make me want to stab my own eyeholes.

Now let’s talk about how I discovered Sugar Daddy eleven years after it was first published.

I work in a large office and pretty much maintain the status that . . . . .



Therefore, I sit in my hole, do my best to make sure I take more than my fair share of work to counteract the fact that . . . .



And read during my downtime.

Occasionally I get approached by a fearless co-worker who is willing to invade my personal bubble in order to talk books. Usually those people are asking for a suggestion because they know how many books I read and what type of variety I’m interested in. I rarely have anyone brazen enough to suggest what I should read next (because seriously NO I DON’T WANT TO READ YOUR FANFIC OR CHURCH LADY GROUP’S BOOK OF THE MONTH SO GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE). Where was I? Oh yeah the ballsy little lady who told me about Kleypas. I explained that historical romance was not my bag and pretty much that . . . .



And read for pleasure so I actively avoid picking up things I already know I won’t like. But little lady was super persistent and pointed out that Kleypas also writes some contemporary stuff and then went on to explain how they are real-life friends and that she’s simply a wonderful human and I should really give her a shot. So I put my name on the waiting list fully prepared to be a wrongreader and 1 Star this thing and get some rabid fanbase trolling me up the ass on a book I didn’t even WANT to read in the first place and being pretty much like . . . . .



But I loved the G.D. thing. Color me shocked. I can’t wait to read the next one.

Prayers for the Stolen by Jennifer Clement

4 Stars

“Love is not a feeling. It’s a sacrifice.”

Dear Jennifer Clement:



Which means she has officially found a fan in me. After reading Gun Love earlier this year I knew it wouldn’t be long before I sought her out again. When Prayers for the Stolen popped up as a recommendation on the library website I didn’t hesitate a second before clicking the “YES PLEASE” button.

This is the story of Ladydi Garcia Martinez and the village she comes from . . . .

“On our mountain only boys were born, and some of them turned into girls around the age of eleven.”

What does that mean, you may ask?

“If I were a girl then I would be stolen. All the drug traffickers had to do was hear that there was a pretty girl around and they’d sweep onto our lands in black Escalades and carry the girl off.”

In Prayers for the Stolen you hear about what happened to one of those girls, as well as what happened to the women whose husbands left the village for work (some who returned for visits, some who sent money, some who brought back “gifts” like AIDS and some who never returned at all) – but most importantly you hear Ladydi’s story and what happened to her after a dead man was discovered in her village . . . .



Authors tend to earn Stars from me by delivering fresh material or at least presenting a new spin on things. Clement is now two for two. I love how she writes a tale that focuses on a child – but is absolutely NOT something that would be considered a young adult book. I have found both Clement novels that I have read to be 100% un-put-down-able and at this point she has secured a place of honor for me amongst other grit-litty types of writers.

The Summer I Turned Pretty by Jenny Han

3 Stars

“It was a summer I’d never, ever forget. It was the summer everything began. It was the summer I turned pretty. Because for the first time, I felt it. Pretty, I mean. Every summer up to this one, I believed it’d be different. Life would be different. And that summer, it finally was.”

Obviously I was not the target demographic for this story, but lemme tell you, it doesn’t even matter. I was all like . . . . .



And totally channeled my inner teenie bopper.

I actually ended up downloading The Summer I Turned Pretty after deciding I needed to read To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before when I discovered it was a Netflix movie. (Of course because it is now a Netflix movie I’m like 17th on the wait list for it.) I read this back-up plan straight through and thought it was a quality summer-fluff type of read. While I am most definitely not a fan of book series that continue on (and on) and prefer my “series” to be so in name only while following new characters, that’s really my only gripe. I highly doubt there’s enough content/plot to continue this book for two more books, but luckily my inability to DNF does not mean I feel compelled to read this through to completion. If you are a fan of YA who wants to read about summer lovin’ and don’t mind a super cliffy ending, this might be the perfect selection for a day when . . . .



(Except that might have to be a cold ROOT beer if you’re actually the age group this book was written for. #momsays)

The Holy Ghost Speakeasy and Revival by Terry Roberts

5 Stars

“That, gentlemen, is what I call nasty good.”

“Sin in a jar.”


Hey David Joy, you should probably read this book. See how the book pushing works both ways???? The only difference is Joy won’t see this and I stalk see everything he posts. But seriously, if you are a fan of David Joy, there’s a solid chance Terry Roberts will work for you. Strange too because the two authors have very different approaches to similar types of characters/locales.

Char gets complete credit for me even hearing about this book, let alone braving my inability to work the interwebs enough in order to navigate my way through the request process over at the oh-so-not-user-friendly Edelweiss. The title alone sold me. And the title doesn’t lie – this absolutely was a story of a traveling troupe which were part revival show and part speakeasy. I was counting on it being my usual slice of fictional South and definitely found myself asking . . . .



Imagine my surprise when I found I was reading . . . . a religious story? Now let me put it on record that I am NOT a religious person. I was raised in the church and made my exodus as quickly as possible upon reaching adulthood. That being said, this story was magnificent so it didn't matter that I wasn't thumping my bible along with the beat. I caught on to the undercurrent of the scripture being thrown about as being more than just a gimmick pretty quickly – and yet I not for one minute ever wanted to put this down or felt like I was being bamboozled (*cough The Shack cough*) or had any sense of disappointment that this wasn’t the “grit lit” I had sought out. Instead I simply sat back and let the words pour over me. Words about family and friendship and loyalty and love and right and wrong and the grey areas in between - and, yes, even the word of the Lord. Words that made me feel some of the feelz and words that made me chuckle . . . Good words.

I’m giving this one all the stars.

ARC provided by Edelweiss in exchange for an honest review.

You Were Made For This by Michelle Sacks

4.5 Stars

I really only have one reaction to share with you all regarding this book . . . .



I have never read something that made me so uncomfortable. If you know me, you know that’s saying a lot. You should also know that means I might maybe want to marry or at least be best friends with Michelle Sacks now. I just can't NOT love an author who is so willing to commit to going balls out into crazyville like she has done here.

Allow me to introduce you to Merry, Sam and their baby Conor . . . .

“If you saw us you’d probably hate us. We look like the cast of an insurance commercial: shiny, happy us. The perfect little family, living the perfect little life. Wasn’t that another perfect day? is what we always say at the end of days like these. A confirmation. A promise. A warding-off of any days that might be anything less.”

My Kindle note: “OH YOU KNOW THESE PEOPLE ARE ASSHOLES!” <<< Quite the wordsmith, aren’t I?

You Were Made For This is the story of what happens when Merry’s lifelong friend Frank comes to visit, and the truth about Merry’s “perfect” life starts to come out.

I’m pretty sure I read at least half of the book like this . . . .



I’m not a big believer in posting spoilers (because I myself have no self-control and tend to click the reveal button only to kick myself for ruining everything) so I’m not going to post one here. However, I will say that this book features 100% vile, irredeemable characters engaging in deplorable acts. If you don’t think you can handle reading something like that, stay far far away because you will want to bleach your brain.

4.5 Stars and really the half star deduction is because that cover is F.U.G.L.Y.

Denied this ARC which goes to show that the powers that be don’t know me too well, because THIS mah fah was a squicky trainwreck that I absolutely could not put down. My librarian always got my back, though ; )