Thursday, October 16, 2014

The Sweet Spot by Stephanie Evanovich

1 Star
Ai yai yai – where do I even begin?

Let’s begin with the fact that my local library is like a drug pusher offering free samples to a heroin addict. Not only do they have a bazillion books on the shelves and a “share” policy with tons of other libraries in the ‘burbs, but they also promote a “new and notable” section which is a first come/first served basis on all the hot new hits . . . and I can’t stop myself from checking something out from this area anytime I walk down thinking I’m simply going to grab whatever items I have on hold.

I grabbed The Sweet Spot as I had read Big Girl Panties and enjoyed the escape to a giant pile of fluff that one gave me. Also, I now reside with a huge diva who cannot understand why Mitchell gets all the praise around here. Sooooo, long story short, I dove into what I would normally call a “summertime” read on a cold and rainy day. Needless to say I was a bit dubious about how much I would enjoy this one . . .

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(Clearly Vixen was excited enough for the both of us)

I came across my first problem immediately. The title and the cover. I’m not one for reading a synopsis generally and if I’ve read/enjoyed an author previously I’ll give them another shot without even bothering to take a glance. I thought the title might actually be a play on words and the story would focus on a cupcake boutique owner or some such. I figured Evanovich would once again feature a full-sized main character (and I was right, I’m so smart), but I was wrong about the “sweet spot” referring to baked goods – it actually referred to spanking of the badonka-donk . . . by a Major League baseball player . . . Hmmmm, my interest level raised a bit.

But I have to address that cover. It’s horrible.

Okay, back to the book. Chase is a MLB hotshot who meets restaurant owner Amanda and is immediately smitten . . . even more so when she is able to resist his animal magnetism. He spends time trying to woo her and eventually she caves in – all the time wondering what kind of skeleton is waiting to fall out of his closet.

I was kinda digging the light and fluffy cat and mouse game between Chase and Amanda – and having the MC be a baseball player during non-stop postseason baseball games being broadcasted in my family room was just too much of a co-inky-dink. I must confess that even though Chase is clearly described as a first baseman – my first baseman isn’t one the ladies probably fantasize about dropping their panties over.

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(FYI - that what speed do)

Instead my brain instantly went to this blonde beauty. . .

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But then we found out the skeleton in Chase’s closet is a giant hand that likes to smack girls on the ass when they are “naughty” – without even bothering having a discussion with them that he has a bit of a proclivity for the ol’ slap and tickle. Ummmmm, methinks that would be called domestic violence. And of course rather than telling this d-bag to go fly a kite, Amanda sits and pines over how to justify being “disciplined” for things like using foul language (because “that’s not how a lady should act,” dontcha know).

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^expletives deleted

I realize that the dom/sub thing is all the rage and horny housewives across America have spent gazillions of dollars on books containing this subject matter, but promoting a clearly ABUSIVE situation where the woman has no say, no safe word, is told she can never question what the man believes is right/wrong combined with a main character who continually confesses all of her own insecurities and clearly should never be in a relationship that makes her feel even less self-worth is just not cool. Stephanie Evanovich – stick to vanilla lovemaking ‘cause this is NOT your forté.

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