Saturday, July 18, 2015

Her by Harriet Lane

2 Stars

^^^That's me . . . well, you know, only less deliciously humpable.

What can I even say about Her? Maybe I should just let one of the MCs speak for me . . .

"I don't think I like these characters."

The problem is I didn't actively dislike them either. They were so "meh" I couldn't muster up much feeling for them at all. (If you actively follow my reviews, you'll know this is the second time in like two weeks this has happened to me and at this point Mitchell's getting angry!)

Alright, so the premise of the story is that Nina remembers Emma from waywayback. A chance encounter brings the two back together again and they develop a friendship. Or do they?!?!?!? DUN DUN DUNNNNNNN!

Yeah, this didn't work for me. I'm all for the slow roller, but seriously the entire reason this bitch Nina wants to friend poor unsuspecting Emma is to seek revenge because Nina's father might have looked at Emma as a hot piece of tail back when they were teenagers and because of Nina's big mouth and insinuations to her mother about all of the stuff that really wasn't going on, her parents split up. Now eleventy years later, Nina has her sights set on revenge . . . but nothing really happens until like the very last page and then it's open ended and I was all . . . .

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I hate feeling like I've been jipped when I'm finished reading. I don't mind open endings, I don't mind despicable characters or unreliable narrators. What I do mind is reading a chapter from one mealy-mouthed character's perspective and then reading the EXACT SAME SCENE from the other mealy-mouthed character's perspective only for nothing to ever happen (except me feeling like I wasted my entire evening) . . . .

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If you really loved The Girl on the Train, then Her might work for you as well. On the other hand, if you're looking for an actual dark story that culminates over a vacation and is filled with truly horrifying characters, I recommend Summer House with Swimming Pool.

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